Friday, August 20, 2010


OK, so I know its been MONTHS since I last posted and I have no excuse....other then I started to think blogging was bad for me. I know, right, fucked. Since when is an outlet for thoughts and emotions "bad"? But that show took over my life and my time and I had to make a choice. During the shoot, do I focus on my personal quest for self destruction, thinness at any cost....or do I stop being a fucking pussy and just dive in head first to see where it all takes me. So I made the conscious choice to stop posting. and I'm sorry. I really have missed you guys. It's been empty. That's the only word I have for it...empty. I've been occupying someone else's mind though, so that made it a lot easier. I play a pretty complex chick in this show, and being in her head was hard a lot of the time. Painful. Usually there isn't a character out there who's more difficult to play then me. But this one was tough. Needless to say, it went well, I had an amazing time and I think I really grew as an artist. Hopefully you'll all see me this fall without knowing its me :)
I have to apologize, I know, for deserting everyone. I wish I could say it won't happen again but my new resolution is to not make gargantuan claims I can't follow through on. I do it too much as it is. I'll write when I can. I am very sorry for those of you who worried though! I know there's a lot of you out there, and I hope I didn't cause you too much stress. I'll understand if you want to stop reading.
I didnt get THAT many comments while I was gone, so I don't think there are too many of you to address. But there's one I ought to nip in the butttttt. Miss, you're wrong :) but not so far off.
missed you ladies! I WILL try to write again soon. oh, before I forget- weight 110! not so bad. I'm starting to not hate myself at 110 which I feel is significant progress. And I maintained it through the entire shoot. We'll see how I look on screen :)