Ok, so the producer meeting is tomorrow which is wicked cool. They faxed over all the paperwork we're gonna be going over last night...and my contract actually has a FAT clause!!!! I am not permitted to gain more then 10 pounds during the run of the show....it says nothing, of course, of losing weight! I thought that was hilarious...and awesome!!! I mean, the more incentives not to eat the better, right? My dad wasn't too happy...but he won't say anything about it. Thats why i like him, the strong silent type. He wants to protect me from the world that i beg and plead and would do anything to be a part of...but he knows how badly i want it and i think he wants it that badly for me!!! Anyway...i just thought that was a funny section of the agreement!!! I will happily sign!!!
On that note, a lot of comments have been talking about my happiness level. I am happy, very happy...i mean, things are happening exactly as i planned....everything! However, i don't really do anything else...i spend the majority of my time exercising, which, though i love it, gets tiresome and repetitive. My only real friend is my father. My mother doesn't speak to me or care at all about my existence, I have an nasty little habit of landing myself in the hospital right in the midst of VERY IMPORTANT SHIT, and i will most likely die before 40 because of bone deterioration or some other shit thing not eating for 12 years does to the body. But despite all that....yeah, i'm happy. It might be a skewed, slightly messed up version of happiness...but who is there to judge, i have no one!!!! The less people you let in, the less people there are to compare yourself and the state of your life to...to put things in perspective. On the upside...who wants to live past 40??? wrinkles, children, marriage, mortgages...doesn't sound magical to me...so yes....HAPPY...happy happpy happy!!!! I hope you all are as happy as i am!!!! peace out...and stay in it to win it little ladies!!!!